he said,

how many time must i say goodbye?

2006-06-15T02:20:00.000+08:00

how many times must i say goodbye?
how many times must i say goodbye?
how many times must i ask "why dun u care?"?
how many times must i fall to learn?
or how many times must i fall so it wont hurt so much?
goodbye, my once frens. actualy there isnt much memories right so just take whatever there is and leave. go right out of my life and never come back....

stucked!

2006-06-11T01:58:00.000+08:00

hello, i rmb one fren telling me that in a person's life there will be 3 frens that he/she makes that last a lifetime. well, i have always tried to be one of her three frens. i dont know if i'm gonna be a fren for a lifetime, but i know the good old memories we share are still vividly trapped in my mind and when i think of them i just can't leave this fren alone. Friends, a weird term to me. i think i never understood what friends are, and i thought i did. i have frens whom we get close by chance and maybe we got together becos we have to? i dont know, although i have given hopes on them or rather i have chose to leave their circle of life, i feel sad, i feel very sad when i think of it. sometimes i wonder if its becos i'm not worth it, not worth their friendship, or wadsoever. but i know i have done all that i could and they are just not reciprocating, thats y i'm just not doing anything anymore becos there's nothing more embarassing than forcing a friendship out of others. well, so wad its ever since sec sch, it doesnt matter afterall i guess. but i do wanna say, iu have many good frens and to be honest i'm glad to have whoever ihave now. i'm a happy girl when i'm around them. i can be myself at the very least!

hello i'm back

2006-04-23T23:17:00.000+08:00

chiasin is back from the break.
this is a special shout out to lemmy-O! thank you so much for being there, and u have taught me alot. i think i wouldn't be able to think things thru this fast on my own. yup. anyway below is an update of my life. very brief but interesting!!

2006-03-19T14:46:00.000+08:00

chiasin is gone. if u miss her u can play the video below or you can leave a msg.

2006-03-15T01:40:00.000+08:00

it is zee emo moment again. i feel like crying my heart out now.. maybe i'm sad or maybe i'm feeling guilty or feeling bad thats y i wanna cry. i dont know, sometimes i cry when i'm happy too. there will always be these few days when i feel like watching a sad movie, a movie that will guarantee my tears.
tell you something, the older my ma gets, the younger she becomes? heh? nani kore?
i realised my mother is like a little girl who's far away from home. away from the home where she grew up, the place where her childhood memories are created, the place where she is surrounded by love, where she could throw her tantrums around abit. now she's the one listening to all her kids' screams and tantrums. she's the one worrying about why isnt the last guy of the family home yet? she's the one saying" i hate to cook" and she's still the one busy scribbling down every detail of the cooking show on tv. sometimes i really wonder, what a mother do( and what a father do) when they miss their mother/father?
recently, my uncle and his family migrated to Singapore. he's my mum's cousin so he's much younger, his kids are only 11 and 9. i felt the responsiblilty of being a somewhat older sis and it feels good, cos they are very sweet kids. i have to say taiwanese kids are just brought up differently. my uncle's mum(grand aunt) came along too. she's dotes on my mum alot and we are very close.
in my 18years on this universe i have never seen my mum talking like such little girl, she opens her eyes wide and nods at every sentece my grandaunt says. no matter how busy my mum is, she puts the things aside and attend to them first. and this is the only time i dont stop my mother from being too concern. cos she is always too concern abt others that she neglects her needs or she just get cheated. but if it's for them, it's totally worthwhile giving up some of her time. chessy? maybe. but i come from a family where we stay far away from our relatives, we seldom see our kins. we usually spend cny with family frens. but this year was a whole new experience. family to me is so far yet i feel the warmth.
[p/s: i'm gonna see my aiba uncle soon.. ]

last fri's night cycling from downtown east to changi village was shiok!! really, we rode through forest-like paths, we braked countlessly and we screamed and shouted endlessly. hahahaha, it was madness yet seem so sane. i see the good old faces. i see the good old frens. i ate the good old almond longan and we enjoy a good old sleep.

2006-03-11T20:55:00.000+08:00

i had the most amazing time of this year on friday, zee 10th march, at downtown east. changi village!

When God ran.

2006-03-06T00:39:00.000+08:00

Almighty God, the great I am
Immovable rock, omnipotent, powerful,
awesome Lord Victorious warrior, commanding King of Kings Mighty conqueror,
and the only time
the only time I ever saw Him run

CHORUS: Was when He ran to me,
He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said "My son's come home again"
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice
He said,'Son do you know I still love you?'
He caught me by surprise when God ran

The day I left home I knew I'd broken His heart
And I wondered then if things could ever be the same
Then one night I remembered His love for me
And down that dusty road ahead I could see It was the only time
it was the only time I ever saw Him run

And then He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest, said 'My son's come home again'
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said,"Son do you know I still love you?"
He caught me by surprise as
He brought me to my knees
When God ran - I saw Him run to me

BRIDGE: I was so ashamed, all alone and so far away
But now I know He's been waiting for this day
I saw Him run to me,
He took me in His arms Held my head to His chest,
said "My son's come home again"
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice
I felt His love for me again

He ran to me, He took me in His arms
Held my head to His chest,
said "My son's come home again"
Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes
With forgiveness in His voice He said, "Son", He called me Son
He said, "Son do you know I still love you?"
He ran to me and then
I ran to Him When God ran

2006-03-05T14:55:00.000+08:00

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind Still
You hear me when I'm calling Lord,
You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

disillusions

2006-03-03T01:07:00.000+08:00

when you sit down and talk to people, you will start to realise the different sides of you in others people's eyes. some are totally not you, some are just somewhat similar. but who are we really? i guess i'm so sick of this whole self seeking shit that i start to think i know myself, i believe i know myself but from the things happening around and from how i'm feeling right now, clearly i guess i still dont know myself well enough.

i really dislike being emo, i dislike thinking so much becos it screws up my mind, it confuses me, it covers over my initial thoughts and in the end, i gain nothing. i rmb telling my fren that the ups and downs in life give pain and weariness to a person but we unknowingly becomes stronger. its strange, cos recently i fell in love with the color blue and the song blue. is that why i'm feeling so blue? nah it isnt lame ok, cos i really havent been very happy altho t's my holidays and etc.. but i'm stil looking forward to the day when i step onto the land of the rising sun and watch zee summer con and shout my lungs out!!! see i'm insane, r u still gonna take me as yr fren or am i just someone that you've seen, laughed at but never could remember?

i want to be a postman, a ice cream man/woman, and a pizza delivery person in Vespa.

2006-03-01T16:10:00.000+08:00

Dear my friend

visuals for the last sem.

2006-03-01T00:10:00.000+08:00

these pictures are kinda old alr. but nonetheless, here they are:

2006-02-27T00:54:00.000+08:00

i had a conversation with a friend today.

Ooopuusu

2006-02-23T01:24:00.000+08:00

i haven't blog much abt any happenings lately becos life has been a bitch to me. all i coud feel is angst within me, i'm angry at anything and everything, i hate the way i am, i hate many people. and the feeling is bad. becos when i think again, i dont hate, i care too much. i dont care enough for others and i care too much for myself. there's still tonnes of stuff stuckd in my head that i have to remove, but for now i see some light. life could have been much more beautiful if i haven been the bitch myself. irony? no. it's just that i have been living in denial. everything and everyone i see sorta upsets me, school is kinda crazy, i dont know why because this sem is supposedly damn slack. my life in a total total mess, i refused to talk to anyone abt my 'problems', i refuse to explain anything and i refused to talk. i just scream. yes, the most irritating thing to do, i scream, i scream my head off every 10-15mins at home. and after screaming i feel worse, becos what i wanted to say is still in me, all i let out was just bullshit. i have let myself go too far, so far that i'm not too sure if i can bring myself back. but i know where i can seek help.

the things that have been keeping me going are His words, my jappie-jap-jap-cool-kana-tomodachis and my parents.

2006-02-14T01:11:00.000+08:00

hey try this out
http://kevan.org/johari?name=chia_sin

tell me what are some words tat u would use to descirbe me.

2006-02-01T20:23:00.000+08:00

i came home today feeling super tired but finally IS down and off my back. i took a 3hrs nap and woke up feeling kinda empty. i feel like there's always work undone, i want to complete all of them in a day but work just keeps coming. the 2 months hols to come is comforting tho.

now, what do you say about people who tries to put you down, in any way. they might just be making causual remarks but to you it makes helluva difference. but who can actually really put you down if you dont put yourselves down. many times, i ask myself why am i always less capable than others, sometimes i say it's my pride that is telling me i need to be better. but is it really just all about being better than others? there are couple of guys i know who uses words like 'shut up', 'having you here always makes us lose', etc. in the beginning, i took it as a joke, i even joined in the 'fun'. it's until one day, i start to believe what they say because they shoved it right in my face everytime i'm there, right in my face. for a moment, i agree i suck but it didnt take me long to realise that's all bullshit because only i'm good enough to tell myself(other than The Almighty) if i suck or not and then that's when i got pissed. i stopped talking to them because if all they could say to me are words that puts others down, why in the first place they talk? ok, i'm not pissed now but i'm saying it here because this is my space, yea?!
the reason why i havent told these guys how i feel is because they would probably think i'm just another 'petty girl' or they will apologise and start doing it all over again like what they always do.

hurhur i'm gonna start my madnesss again, hurhur... today i present to you aiba masaki!

sakurai overdosed!

2006-01-25T18:53:00.000+08:00

happy birthday sakurai sho.
we'll never forget " where's your dad? ken." , " could you take a picture for us". And " 5,6, get it out, when i say lucky you say man!"

life is hard dakedo happy.

2006-01-21T02:46:00.001+08:00

te agero! today, i started work at Mary's place. She's such a nice lady and the people there are really sociable. definitely more patient than i am. i'm glad that finally i got a job and its kinda cool, you know the food is nice haha.. i was pretty high when i was working haha yes because i'm one step closer to japan and the best thing is its a japanese restaurant. too bad they dont play japanese music.. haha and u know what i'm gonna do that yea :)
well, i just happy. truly from within.
pardon me for the overdosage of arashi:))))))))))))))))))))

life is hard dakedo happy.

2006-01-21T02:46:00.000+08:00

life is hard dakedo happy.

2006-01-11T00:55:00.000+08:00

hmmm sch's ok but the work is crap. computer graphics kept me sitting in the library for hours not knowing wad on earth i was doing and i almost pulled all my hair out. yes.. chiasin without hair, the worse nightmare! anyway, i went to port dickson last weekend the beach there is really nice..the weather added on a tint of loneliness..yea but i got a big surprise, i found all the movies and vcds that are not found in singapore. hmm thats not too bad huh.

recently, i had an overdose of arashi. i feel kinda guilty for getting stucked in a unrealistic world. but it felt more real than any other thing. actually its not so bad huh, cos it keeps us happy but i hope i just dont fall too deep. yep. seems like this entry sound the most decent. yea hope i can still stay sane after the flash assginment. good luck to you and me! bambi!

goodbye 2005

2006-01-08T22:36:00.000+08:00

i'm gonna write alittle about 2005 before saying goodbye. 2005 seemed to passed so soon, before i even noticed. i would say i've experienced one of the worse times in this year, but i also say i had my best time too. i thought it was the end of me and all my dreams but i only realised i was holding on to false hopes and an unrealistic dream. i lost hope and i lost faith in me, my friends and family. i blamed everyone for my misfortunes. i saw many of my friends leaving, i saw people dying and i mean i really see them die, from a walking man to a man lying on the ground with blood all over slowly dying. i was not traumatized but i saw how fragile life can be, was scared. a fear within me that cannot be described. but the Mighty one comforted me and i know i'll lie safe in His arms.

i wanna say thank you to hcmcyfers and yagers, you guys are so different from people i used to know and there are good and bad times with you guys. but when i think back, i'm still glad that i've known you people.

thank you for my friends who are always there for me, listen to me ranting like a mad ass on the phone. thanks!

thank you razhumiya, sarah ohno, ohno satoshi, ninomiya kazunari, sakurai sho, aiba masaki and matsumoto jun. for bring joy into my life. making me happy all the time and the kind of happiness is not just a moment of excitement. i guess i no need to say much, you guys know what i mean! thank you!

goodbye 2005.

2006-01-06T23:05:00.000+08:00

Third Day - You are So Good to Me

You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
And I will sing again
You are so good to meYou heal my broken heart
You are my father in Heaven (2x)

You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You ride upon the clouds
You lead me to the truth
You are the Spirit inside me (2x)

You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song
You are beautiful my sweet, sweet song

And I will sing again
You are my strong melody, yeah
You are my dancing rhythm
You are my perfect rhyme
And I will sing of You forever
You poured out all Your blood
You died upon the cross
You are my Jesus who loves me (2x)
You are my Father in Heaven
You are the Spirit inside me
You are my Jesus who loves me

He put my feet back on the ground so i can dance again!

this post is not about my boyfriend or any guy i like.

2006-01-04T22:05:00.000+08:00

i love you so dearly, why u just dont understand me? why cant u just respect what i like, what i wanna do? am doing it wrongly? is it really my fault? why does it seem as though whatever i do just displeases u so much? why ? why? why cant u just listen and understand???? why cant i just shut up and not have expectations?

2005-12-31T23:41:00.000+08:00

it's insane. madness. craziness. an obsession but it has made me so much happier, enjoying every moment of it. i started smiling to myself, i started blasting my earphones! and it's just many many many days more of happiness.

do u get it? no, you dont. but i know who does.
razhumiya. sarah ohno. cs okadasho :)

2005-12-27T03:44:00.001+08:00

Happy 10th anniversary Viva Viva V6!!

2005-12-27T03:44:00.000+08:00

http://www.geocities.com/v6_family/discography/Singles/arigatounouta.jpg" alt="Image hosted by Photobucket.com">

http://www.geocities.com/v6_family/top_logo2.gif" alt="Image hosted by Photobucket.com">

Happy 10th anniversary Viva Viva V6!!

2005-12-20T21:35:00.000+08:00

History is a gallery of pictures where there're only a few originals but many copies.

how true. a person can be so bothered, can toss and turn on their beds, can dream, can cry over, this crazy little thing call memories. haha gotcha not love, but memories.. yes.. something that can hurt u yet u can't live without.

motivated( no more)

2005-12-07T00:45:00.000+08:00

yes, i know all the problem lies totally on me. but i cant help it. all the crap i have been telling myself is nothing but lies to make me feel better. living in denial makes things worse or does it really helps. i hate myself talking like that, but i guess i have to admit this is me. the unreasonably weird and selfish me. i hate to see people having fun without me. it just makes me think that i'm not appreciated.
you know, people say that life is unfair, but this is how the things work isnt it? people can get all the love, all the attention and everything when they dont do much, but people who does so much gets nothing, not even thank you.

i'm gonna vent my anger here, cos this is my blog. get it?!
i hate it when you just dont appreciate others, when u think being ard retarded pple is embarassing. when u rush off to things without listening and when u give that face, yes i hate your face!

and you, i hate it when yr attitude is so lukewarm, friendship with ME just doesnt mean anything does it?

you, you were there when i'm sad to tsay a joke to cheer me up, but i know, i have no place in you. so would you fuck off, and stop palying ard with me.

you, i dont know whats yr problem, neither do i know mine. stop treating me as if like you own me. alright. learnt to shut your mouth.

friends? what's that? people who come and go huh? people who ask' is the shop call..."
people who tell you " hey, fren forever".
i dont believe in those shit ok!

most probably, the problem lies in me, cos i have a damn bad attitude, idamn rebellious. you dont know cos i try to hide. i cant hide anymore. see, this is me, get it? THIS IS ME! disguested, arent you?

2005-11-15T02:46:00.000+08:00

i guess it's just really hard to predict wad's on a person's mind. why can't people just not have so much of emotions. no matter how frank a person is, s/he still can be fickled minded, but maybe just at a lower level. so i figured the only solution is to just heck wadever others think, cos there's no way to please someone as people never stops desiring for more.

on a brighter note, my big eye buddie, kong zi xie is coming back tmr/ today! and soon fat bro is coming home on thurs. the excitement is not abt him but the things he's bringing back. har har!
yep and i'm now his part time secretary in return. anyway, its cool having people coming back home, sarah and jan will be back soon and yea..

camp prep is on schedule and we're gettin pretty psyched up abt it alr, or rather i'm alr very psyched up in the sense that i've alr thot of christmas presents for people.

well sch's pretty ok. its just alittle slack now, but we sorta see work coming in. however, just i'm just not as enthu man, and the sch seems pretty dead nowadays. maybe its just me. oh we saw " mee pok man" today. and i tell u, its a disturbing film. in a way, its really funny, becos the characters does things that people dont normally do. the disturbing part is not really when he keeps bunny's dead body at home and buries his face into it so much. it is when you see that how a 'nice' person always keeps to himself and say yes to everything and one fine day he just breaks out. thats really freaky. really. in wad ways i dont know. but it frightens me, alot. you know many times people seen as " abnormal' may be the normal ones but the 'normal' people are the hypocritical ones. ok i think i just dont really make sense here. but yea, that film keeps my mind wondering non-stop, abt nothing. but yea, i still think erickhoo is interesting cos his ideas are eccentric and u see that he's tryin to bring forth a certain degree of humor or rather to him a matter of fact which is often perceived as funny. see again, i'm not making any sense.
yah, so off to slumberland.

when we do it the UBWAY!

2005-11-14T00:51:00.000+08:00

you coming?

2005-11-06T00:45:00.000+08:00

i really didnt know. that this hurts quite badly huh. wad has gotten into me that make me such a fool? i guess i talked too much in the past maybe. but it's painful, it really is. i hate to admit, i hate to agree but my every action is chucking it right back at me. but i dont get it, this cant be real. because it has never been.

stuck in the moment. grey.

ね、くるみ。

2005-11-04T02:33:00.000+08:00

Hey, walnut ねえ，胡桃
How is this city's scenery reflected in your eyes? 　　この街の景色は君の目にどう映るの?
How do you see me now? 今の僕はどう見えるの?

Hey, walnut ねぇくるみ
I can hear the sarcasm in someone's kindness 誰かの優しさも皮肉に聞こえてしまうんだ
What should I do in times like that? そんな時はどうしたらいい?

Remembering only the good times 良かった事だけ思い出して
It brings a lot of feelings of aging やけに年老いた気持ちになる
None the less, in life とはいえ暮らしの中で
You have to become a gear 今動き出そうとしている
Going into action 歯車のひとつにならなくてはなぁ

Despair will increase with hope 希望の数だけ失望は増え
Even so, my heart trembles with the coming day それでも明日に胸は震える
"What will happen?" 「どんな事が起こるんだろう?」
I try to guess 想像してみるんだよ

2005-11-02T01:30:00.000+08:00

phewww, i really feel much better now. thanks to my all-time- so- wonderful senior, becka!! and the sleepover at twin cas's was great. fantastic!! man it feels so gd to just talk rubbish and laugh like mad dogs together until 6am and freaked out when we heard the birds chirped but still cant help but laugh into our pillows. madness. in a very very very gd way:))))))))))
i was quite excited over zee SST. but somehow, now i just feel that there's no point trying so hard to accomplish something like that. i dont know y i'm feeling this way. nope i'm not depressed, maybe just tired. or inconfident. but i think its gd that i've sorta learn to let nature take its course. and i know i can find that strength and energy to get it althogether again.

i'm so motivated by the 30th aug-event!! and i know i'm not alone:)

surprise. not.

2005-10-31T01:35:00.000+08:00

u know. altho i may seem so head strong, so stubborn sometimes unreasonable , irritating and most of the time nonsensical, i too long to be loved. i feel loved by my frens, loved by my family and loved by the boss up there. but something is missing huh. just when i thought someone truly cares and is actually so determined to change my mind, poof it's all gone. how strange.

haha sch sch sch.. its a kinda slack sem ahead, but i'm still looking forward to it. i'm truly glad. i've got most of the things planned out for the 30th aug 2006. i'm so very excited and its a dream come true indeed.

2005-10-28T01:47:00.000+08:00

today i had the 2nd jap lesson. haha i dont know, i find myself laughing at the silliest things.. haha rmb takun? haha he's hilarious. today he laughed out loud again.. haha and his laughter dont suit him.. haha i know i shudnt comment on this but its really funny, not in a bad way but it just makes u laugh. ok enuf. again, i think my teacher is damn power, she make everyone so happy. is it her? is it the jap fever? or are japs just simply cool kana desho ne!? i know rachie and sarah are nodding their heads now.. hee:)

u know i thank god for great frens like cas, yf and co to go crazy with me, to quarrel with me, to scold me, to let me scold(haha) .
for my 2 duo hua, to go insane with me, to do stupid jap old boy band moves, to hug me when i needed it most, to tell me "hey arashi rocks, alright!!", to do sign language with me and those wonderful sleepovers that simply turn the super depressed me into the ol' crazy happy me again.
for my seniors, to cry with me, to listen to me whine, to hear me crap, to allow me to be a child, to tell me "things will be alright".
for my hcmc churchies, to capsize with me, to capsize me, to let me capsize, to let me know they care, to tell me a joke, to tell me i need to go back to christ always, to pray with me, to go crazy in camps with me.
for the happy cult, to care for me, to cheer me up, to make me angry, to find joy in the lamest things, to bintan with me, to bombard me, to fart together.
for nice pple, helpful pple, cool pple, arty farty pple that came along the way to make life more colourful and teach me things i nv knew.
for all these pple to love me and for me to love:)
appreciated. really. see this is how emo i can get. but its gd right!

its so amazing how our creator works, how he bring the right person at the right time, how he smiles, how he frowns, how he creates, how he gives, how he takes away, how he do everything. things just fall into place. nicely. perfectly. unexpectedly and sometimes, unknowingly:)

2005-10-26T10:29:00.000+08:00

this music video is really cool. its by this jap band name Mr children. in the video its abt this grp of frens who used to be a band but as they age and stufff they've moved on to lead their own life. and one day the lead singer tried to bringthe band tog again. he name themselves mr dults instead of mr children simply cos they're much older alr. and at the end of the mv, the guy who picked up the paper ball is the lead singer of mr children. watch it. its cool.

simply click play

history is a gallery of pictures in which there are a few originals but many copies.

oh-so-peculiar

2005-10-23T19:38:00.000+08:00

haha today is a peculia-yet-fun-and-crazy day. ok well i guess hanging ard ty, ja, zx, kym, pamich and the usual churchies is just like that. the meeting was not too bad, in fact was gd! we went to Settlers after that, and thats it man, we just went crazy. we played Slamwich first. ja just slam anything so he ended up giving everyone cards but still i was the ultimate loser cos i anyhow slam+slow+no munchers.
next was apples to apples. man it was crazy, i'm sure ty has to throw the 'iceberg' card and say horrifying. for a moment we were stunned. and black holes are handsome, rock bands are delicious, the universe is idoitic, it is an awkward thing to see a dead actor's movie and marilyn monroe is masculine. hmmmm now we all have abs!

nowadays everything just makes me laugh and i know y.
thank you for caring! :)

i read this msg just now and it just made my day!! yay!!
i know i sound retarded can, but i like!

2005-10-22T05:28:00.000+08:00

these days i havent been sleeping well at all.. i dont know why man.. now everywhere is aching, neck, arms, legs... oh man.
u know it's very strange that some time someone can be so nice to u that u wonder if he/she's right in the mind but that same person can just treat u harshly without any reason at anytime or place.. how strange, i dont understand. and the next weirdest thing is that this person in actually quite well liked by most pple.. hmmmmmm....

i dont think i'll get to watch the spurs match on sat, ta ma de....... this entry is unbelievably random i know, but as u can tell from the time i blog that i can't sleep now. so yahh bear with it. i got to rattle some rubbish till i get sleepy...

oh man, one more week to sch. no comments. i wanna go windsurfing again.. haha it was a fun experience but extremely tiring. the no of times i have to climb back on the board and the no of times i fall is ridiculous.... but still i had fun and i love it. i had my first jap intermediate class on thurs... mannn it was exciting.. i dont know how to explain. but woahh intermediate class is a killer man. damn difficult, all the changing forms and stufff mannn ... my teacher is hilarious.. she is no sports lover or party animal but she just can bring so much laughter to the class. this guy who looks soooooo much like takun from " be with you" laughed so hard man. seriously i dont know y he laughed that hard that he actually fell onto the chairs beside him from time to time, and he clapped his hands as he giggles... mannn its the first lesson and he's like that, next time how??? haha but i like to see him laugh like that, dont know y... its just very funny and can be quite contagious... haha.. and he really look like takun, its scary.

30 aug '06 is a special day. its the day dreams come true.. yea?? i can't wait!!

hmmmm

2005-10-17T18:21:00.000+08:00

its amazing, how i want to find out so much more abt u.
its amazing, how i yearn to know wad u like.
its amazing, how i long to see u smile.
its amazing, how i love u so.

zee SST

2005-10-15T02:40:00.000+08:00

this is wad boredom drove me to do...

Stuck in a moment by U2

2005-10-14T22:02:00.000+08:00

I'm not afraid
Of anything in this world
There's nothing you can throw at me
That I haven't already heard
I'm just trying to find
A decent melody
A song that I can sing
In my own company

I never thought you were a fool
But darling look at you
You gotta stand up straight
Carry your own weight

These tears are going nowhere baby
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it

Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it

I will not forsake
The colors that you bring
The nights you filled with fireworks
They left you with nothing
I am still enchanted
By the light you brought to me
I listen through your ears
Through your eyes I can see

And you are such a fool
To worry like you do
I know it's tough
And you can never get enough
Of what you don't really need now

My, oh my
You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Oh love, look at you now
You've got yourself stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
I was unconscious, half asleep
The water is warm 'til you discover how deep

I wasn't jumping, for me it was a fall
It's a long way down to nothing at all

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it

And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if our way should falter
Along the stony pass

And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if your way should falter
Along this stony pass
It's just a moment
This time will pass

2005-10-14T13:45:00.000+08:00

i'm saying all this here is becos i think i shud let you know. whoever you are, u know it or u dont i dont care. i just wanna say, u know i hate yr attitude, i think u r a damn hypocrite. maybe i am too to u.. but who cares. i'm disgusted by u. yes, really. i'm sorry i'm not an understanding person, i'm just like that, irritating, selfish, wilful everything ok! i hope i can have nothing to do with this place and the pple there. cos its no longer the same, just not the same. but i cannot. why???????????????????????????????????????????

2005-10-12T23:17:00.000+08:00

hello! yup, back from korea. woohoo korea is shiok!! nice weather, cool people, high tec and all.. the pple are straight forward and stuff, super good. cos they dont beat ard the bush, haiyah, just gd lah.. yup and the place is beautiful, the mountains, the sea, their stories... its cool. they have nice funny commercials, i like!!
hmmm maybe photos later, but i think this is a fruitful trip, i learned more abt their culture, it interests me in some way.. and now that i know more, the way koreans act and appear just make more sense. during the trip, i've straightened out some thoughts.. it makes me feel gd, more free and happier. i learn this from the koreans man, not happy, just trash it out and after that all bad memories erased! cool spirit.
now in the midst of planning the yf camp, i'm getting pretty excited becos i cant work with pam!!!( huh, wad u toking abt?).. haha huh?
i wanna make this camp good for God. i'm hoping for alot of things to be achieved outta this camp, hope it works if its god's will too!!

i'm looking forward to the next sem, simply becos of photography!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and am curious to know more abt com graph.. yup, i'm looking forward to more crazy times with the missy nicole and the missy cat woman!! the crazy loonie of the class.. man, they're some crazy shit!! come on, challenge our eccentricity!!!

i'm tired of waiting, really. i'm almost reaching my limit. but i know, it will come. it will....
deccccc quick come, i want CHRISTMASSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111

2005-10-04T08:34:00.000+08:00

hey y'all!! this post is from korea. mannn its fun with nice cooling weather..haha iforesee morefuhn. it's indeed fruitful. ok shall update more when i'm back!

zee genting trip!!

2005-09-25T16:58:00.000+08:00

2005-09-23T01:25:00.000+08:00

i miss my fat bro so much now. i dont know why, i miss him more each day. really. I LOVE THE HOT GAY CLEMENT CHOW YU HSENG!!!!!!

hey my friend, you know i'm not depressed but i'm just trying to be honest with myself. maybe i'm not doing it right, maybe i'm acting strange. but i wanna say, i think u just dont know me. i'm glad i have a fren who is just like me. cos u understand. thank you.
you know, i love my frens, i love my family, i do. but i think i did it the wrong way.

random bullshit.

2005-09-16T22:19:00.000+08:00

i'm feeling so tired. hmmm tired from trying tired from doing so much. maybe its just me, that i'm so lazy and so pessimistic. if there's a place like the island where tidus( final fantasy vv) stays i would go, no i would run there, fly there. childish me. who cares.
do people live for themselves or do they live for others? i admire pple who can put aside all criticism and all gossips and just do wad they think is right. how's it like if i'm the only one left on earth? lonely and eventually die of loneliness? a sense of freedom? hmmmm
if i gonna continue it's gonna go on forever. cos i realised i think so much, too much. every min smth is runnig thru my mind, and things that i think abt are usually super random. but this is me. i think,talk,write random stuff. i start to think, its not me living my life but i'm living my life cos of that one purpose but i have yet to find out. or maybe i knew what iti s alr, but am in denial.

i was caught speechless

2005-09-14T22:53:00.000+08:00

i hope what i heard today is not true. my heart sank, it really did. not because i have anything against it but because of the story behind, because of the pain i know u may be going thru, and beacause you're a special friend to me. you made me happy when i hated the situation i was in so badly.

2005-09-13T21:30:00.000+08:00

i just saw photos of you. hmmm yea now that the feeling is not there anymore, i think i still miss that smile. yr mischievous look. yr screwed up brain. yr act of arrogance. yr silliness. yr stupid emotions. yr irritating questions. i miss you? do i miss the old u? or r u still the same old person i knew? or do i just miss you? we both know you're now different. to some extent i hope the u deep inside hasnt changed. i like seeing you do yr shit. now that we no longer cross paths. i hope u can still smile and be that strange little kid doing yr strange little acts.

2005-09-13T21:18:00.000+08:00

now i want to take the camera and take a picture of all of you! :)))))

2005-09-13T00:33:00.000+08:00

boo!